The Eyes Don't Have It - Not Anymore

There is a whole industry devoted to the aging process. Or should that be devoted to delaying the aging process. Eat this, learn that, do this, definitely don’t do that (unless you’re Keith Richards).  Amongst all this advice, though, one thing never seems to rate a mention. (Yes, this is a “why doesn’t anyone talk about…” OP). But it isn’t about creaky joints, or weight gain or hair growing where it didn’t used to. 

It is about eyesight, specifically something called presbyopia. Never heard of it right? Exactly – it affects almost everyone, but few outside optometry know it has a name. Rather if it is known by any name, it is what my Dad called “short arms disease” because you start stretching out your arms to make words on a page clearer, until one day your arms simply aren’t long enough to unblur things.

Maybe it is because so many people wear glasses or because we are used to a few grumbles about dim lighting, tiny print or aging in general but I can’t remember anyone ever mentioning the major adjustment needed when your eyesight takes this age-related hit. Presbyopia happens because the eye lens becomes less flexible and pliable as we get older so it can’t focus on little things the way it used to. 

Actually it isn’t really true that no one told me – in my early forties I went for a check-up with my optometrist – the same optometrist I had been going to since my mother insisted on getting my eyes checked at 15, despite no reason to think there was a problem with my eyesight. I was issued with some eye exercises that I never did and a pair of glasses which I wore a few times before leaving them at the bottom of my school bag. And even though I got new frames every few years (and a good thing, too, those first frames were shockers – no photos exist thankfully) mostly they remained unused for a couple of decades.

In my early 40s I noticed my eyes were dry and stinging and it occurred to me that the glasses I mostly forgot might finally be needed. I figured it was age-related but not to worry, it was only for computer work anyway.

But a couple of years later, text on the computer screen was getting the halo effect, so it was back to the optometrist. The need for a new prescription was confirmed and new frames chosen. When I tried on the new glasses, everything was clearer but also very magnified. I wondered if my eyesight really needed that much correction but figured “you’re the optometrist”. The next day at work my reservations were confirmed because the new lenses made the computer screen blurry (but reading a newspaper easy). I took them back and the optometrist agreed to fit a weaker lens, reluctantly though because, he said the weaker lens would suffice for now but I’d need a stronger prescription in a couple of years. “After the age of 45 it is all downhill from there” he said in a despondent yet resigned tone that made me wonder if he was only talking about eyesight.

But he was right – a few years later reading a newspaper even with the new glasses and a reading lamp took a lot of effort so I got another prescription, this time for graduated lenses.

You’re probably wondering why I’m whinging about it, seeing as it happens to everyone - I'm surprised it isn't used more often as a plot device in thrillers - "she's innocent because people in their 40s usually need glasses to read those tiny instructions and she had left her glasses on her bedside table!". But that is my point. In the space of about five years, I’ve gone from having glasses but rarely using them, to needing them for computer work but still able to read without them, to checking I have them with me every time I leave the house because I’m pretty helpless without them. The speed of the change from good eyesight to bad (but not terrible – my distance vision is still 20/20) has taken me by surprise – I didn’t know it would be this quick or drastic. 

And you’ve heard the joke about how deteriorating eyesight is a blessing in disguise because it saves you from seeing the full extent of the ageing process on your face? I thought that was weird because I don’t seem blurry when I look in the mirror and the lighting in my bathroom is good. Until the night I walked into the bathroom with my glasses on. It was disconcerting and I may have researched laser resurfacing later that night. I now understand how older women's make up can go awry (well applied makeup is my new neurosis).

I always remind myself it is a privilege to get older but god I miss having good eyesight. Bloody hell - even a bit of window shopping requires me to get out the old specs to check the price tag. I have found myself wondering why restaurants insist on “mood” lighting and having dash from the laundry to get my glasses so I can read the washing instructions. I need my glasses to go through my jewellery box to find favourite pieces. It wasn’t that long ago I didn't need to do that. 

So if you are not yet in your 40s, consider this your warning. One day you will find yourself thinking “I need a reading lamp”. And do those eye exercises!!